Tuesdays With Morrie?

Tuesdays with Morrie?  Really?  Ummmm...no.  I am a voracious reader and waste far too many hours of my life on movies.  From these books and movies I have but a few expectations...a "Princess Dos and Don'ts List," if you will.  I have been known to read text books for fun...teach me something.  Murder mysteries...attempt to keep me guessing.  Biographies...inform.  Comedies and Slasher Flicks?  Entertain me.  Documentaries?  Cultivate or broaden my interests.  BUT...on MY terms.  I choose to watch a documentary or biography or read text book.  What I do NOT choose to do...EVER...is read a book or watch a movie in which someone else has decided I am expected to cry and feel and learn some uber important life lesson.  Seriously?  For those not paying attention thus far, I am MILDLY resistant to change, I am SLIGHTLY less than open-minded, and YOU are NOT going to teach ME a lesson!  I am too old and too right for that kind of time-suck.  Young guy didn't pay attention to old college professor with loads of wisdom to impart, like he promised, until old guy was on TV comparing statistics against, Yankee great, the Iron Horse! (For the chronically confused, it's Lou Gehrig, Morrie had his disease, ALS, Wiki it.) In theory, the author would have us read it and be moved and learn some cheesy lesson about not neglecting our elders or cherishing the time with them that we do have.  Nice theory.  Try my theory on for size instead.  Don't be an asshole.  Oddly, this works not only when it comes to following through with keeping in touch with someone like you said you would...and, let me hit the pause button here for a second...Morrie wasn't calling him, either...maybe Morrie didn't like him all that much in the first place and was only willing to spend Tuesdays with him because, at that point, he was too sick to turn him away...ok, play button...call who you say you'll call.  Be kind to people.  Spend as much time as you can with those you love, be it your Grandmom or your Grandson.  Don't be an asshole.  See?  My way works!

Tuesdays with Morrie?  Hell no!  Email with Daddy!  
Rog:  My favorite is "Colossal Stupidity."
Voices in My Head:  It was actually an "An Ode to the Colossally Stupid," but I'll let it slide.
Rog:  Be careful in writing this.  You have a tendency to "speak" over the heads of the "audience."
VMH:  Like you would know, I got my height from mommy...unless my audience is tweedlebugs, I'm nowhere near going over anyone's head...also, it sounds like he thinks you guys are stupid...Diane, don't tell Murphy...this may call for an "Occupy Daddy's House."  Right...because I would camp. 
Rog:  Consolidate and simplify - except where you are using the language so beautifully - don't cut any of that, its great.
VMH:  I promised myself, and you, that I wouldn't self-edit...and...ummmm..."except where you are using the language so beautifully"...hello?  That's ALL of it!!!
Rog:  You might take topics like "Colossal Stupidity" and make them a reoccurring theme. 
VMH:  Again, not the title, and I could sit here and go on and on about how he never pays attention to anything I say...ever...ever...in my whole life...and now that's right in front of him...in writing...he still isn't paying attention...but he would say, "What," and then laugh at me.  I have tried, time and again, to be consistent or have theme days...but I am so ADD I can barely keep it together for one post at a time, forget about weekly! 
How I Actually Responded:  I've tried to do recurring themes...but...the thing is, you just never know when you're going to lucky and T.O. is going to try to kill himself again! 
Rog:  Nobody can do that better than you.
VMH:  Sooooo, you're saying I talk too much?  That I go on and on and on and on...  Moi?
Rog:  You should be writing more than a blog - you write beautifully.
VMH:  Are you kidding?  I should be writing a series of "Princess' Guide to..." shelved right next to the "Idiot's Guide to..." and the "...for Dummies"!!!
Rog:  The paradox is that you can comunicate so well that no one can understand you.
VMH:  Yup...that's the problem.  

I then told him about a post I really wanted to write, but hadn't.  I'm a bit concerned that some of you might not see the humor in the time I stumbled across the ideal situation if I ever wanted to be a serial killer.  It was awesome...just sayin'...  Hmmmm...maybe I really do devote a bit too much time to books and movies.


XOXO
~CAT