I feel like I owe you an explanation...
I haven't blogged lately...not because I have nothing to say...things have been kind of crazy busy...tho that's REALLY no excuse...it should be more to tell, right? It's more because I guess, rather than doing something I promised you...and myself...that I wouldn't do...I simply didn't write at all. I promised I wouldn't self-edit...when you simply don't write at all, you go back and delete or edit...or at least that's what I've been telling myself. But the more I think about it...as if it's not the most obvious thing ever...not writing all is TOTALLY self editing so who am I trying to kid???
At any right...it's a lousy explanation and I have no excuse...won't happen again.
Where to begin? I have about a zillion things swimming in my head that I haven't blogged about, even tho I've been dying to but for any number of reasons, felt like I shouldn't...
Ahhhh..so does everyone remember CCL??? Oh wow, when I told you about her the first time...I NEVER thought it could get THIS weird!!! But it did...and I was going to blog...and then I thought, is that mean? So I didn't...but I promised not do that...soooo...oh dear!!! As I'm not sharing her name anyway, how mean could it be...especially when I am merely relaying to you ACTUAL EVENTS and in truth, I can't imagine what to do with her now!
The hair thing was weird, but other than noticing her staring quite a bit, she'd left me alone for a little while. Evidently, she was just planning her next move. Last Monday...maybe the Friday before...totally unimportant...CCL decided to up her game!!! She seems to have learned...maybe thru her SWF support group, that in order to get your target's attention, you should get them where they can't get away. She has mastered this. She waits until I am on a machine or in a corner and can't move and don't see her approach! Damn you Animal Planet!!!
The first day, she decided to ask about issues/illnesses/afflictions/ whatever one chooses to call them that tend to affect my nerve endings and cause extraordinary pain when touched. As you can imagine, she promptly started poking at all the places she thought might be affected. I used almost no expletives while I STRONGLY recommended she stop that...NOW!!!
This didn't seem to come across quiet as authoritatively as I'd have liked. DAMN! 2 days later she found me defenseless on the exercise bike. She came and apologized for touching me without asking. I thanked her, put my earbuds back in, and thought we were done. She continued to stand there...oh good...she wasn't done.
Before I continue...we all know, to one degree or another, we're just a little nuts! It may be obsessively wondering if we've left the iron on or locked the garage. It may be going throwing way more anti-bacterial products as an individual in day or two than some families of 4 use in a week. We may be afraid of things that go bump in the night...but...you know...there are other kinds of crazy...
And one of those kinds, I was reminded my CCL, as she stood next to the bike waiting to consider out "conversation," is just how exactly lithium-dependent bi-polar she is!!! Hey...people have problems...I don't judge...no...really...or whatever, you know, because that is definitely NOT the only thing that makes her CCL...but it was DEFINITELY enough to make me nervous when taken in conjunction with all of her other behaviours!!! I mean...the staring, the touching, the SWF can I have your haircut...and I didn't even mention the shoes yet...and I told you guys I swear when I leave the gym the buzzards are circling because even they know it is just a matter of time before she dumps my body in the desert and leaves more for dead!
Next thing I know it's a barrage of questions every time I turn around! What kind of shoes am wearing? Are they comfortable? They look interesting...where did I get them? CAN SHE TOUCH THEM?!? Am I the only one weirded out here???? Then we've moved onto my clothes...and every. single. thing. I. wear. Really? This track suit, those yoga pants...and I can reply to those questions...most of them...without being made to feel terribly uncomfortable. But now it's hot out and gym clothes are bit different, aren't they? NO! You may not touch my tight yoga shorts to "feel the fabric" you lunatic!!! What part of your body do your yoga shorts cover that you would allow some loon to touch?!? And then there are my tops...when I wear tees instead of gym shirts, they are more often than not fitted and reflect Husband's job...and are often customized as well. They are not the sort of tees that one could just go buy, nor can I imagine why most people would want to...I would imagine they would lack meaning to most people...and NO YOU MAY NOT TOUCH THEM EITHER!!!
And because it just can't stop there...she asked for my digits!!! UGH...might be time to change the phone number!!! LOL
Soooo...aren't you glad I'm back? NO??? Not quite sure yet what tomorrow will hold...but I have so many things on my mind...who knows!!! But I have a sneaking suspicion the "labels" will include: Stephen King, California, Mayor
XOXO
~CAT
Showing posts with label Gym. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Gym. Show all posts
Monday, June 20, 2011
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Is Nothing Sacred?!?
I know I promised to finally do my "Getting to Know Me" post today...and last week...but things got crazy with Husband's work...thus the absence of posts...and today, well, I will write it, but first, I really just need to rant for a minute...I figure I'm entitled (apparently I have "entitlement issues,' but that is best saved for another post) since it's my blog and I can do whatever I damn well please here...evidently to include behaving so childishly as to say "it's my blog and I can!" I'm such a charmer...HA!
So anyway...I'm at the gym this morning and the news ticker at the bottom of the screen flashes "Mickey & Minnie arrested in front of Disney HQ." I was taking a drink at the time whilst on the runny thingie and listening to my Kindle...this is FAR MORE than I have any business attempting at one time, BTW, and when I see this on the ticker, I end up covered in smartwater! Speaking of smartwater...I miss fruitwater, back before they tried to sweeten it and then did away with it all together in favour of vitaminwater...especially the watermelon...OMG...soooo good! Great, now I've made myself sad :( Back to the gym...no, I don't know what the runny thingie is called, I believe "runny thingie" is, in fact, the technical term. So I stare at the muted TV as if I can read lips, and have totally convinced myself that I will know when they start talking about it and be able to ask the trainers to turn it up. This did not happen. I'm pretty sure it was because they never commented on it, and not because I can't read lips. Naturally the second I got off the runny thingie, I'm sprinting for my iPhone to google Mickey & Minnie. And here's where it all sort of goes off the rails in my beautiful mind.
I don't know which group of crazies think the Rapture starts on Saturday, but I'm betting on not so much! What? Calling them "crazies" is insensitive? I'll draw your attention to the "it's my blog" rule. Rest assured that unless I happen to BE the crazy with Doomsday Prophecy and bunker, I will always side with the FBI, ATF, and any other sets of initials I deem appropriate.On that note, for anyone looking to join, "Cult Leader," totally on my bucket list, but I digress...so I hear people talking about the world ending in 5 months while I'm googling Mickey & Minnie's arrest, and to be helpful, "'cause that's how I roll," I offer that they shouldn't worry if nothing happens Saturday because there's always that 2012 silliness. I'm nothing if not helpful, you see. When I see the article about why Mickey Mouse was arrested whilst hearing people blather on about the end of the world...one can only take so much stupid at one time!!!
I get that going green is "in"...yes, yes, it's the responsible thing to do, save the planet...blah, blah, blah...but seriously? It's trendy...at the end of the day, lots of people are all about "saving the earth" because some celeb somewhere is driving a dumbass Prius! Why do the celebs care? Because it's a cause they can take up that makes them look caring and sensitive that's not too icky. Some of you may think I'm wrong, you're entitled, but I'm right...and some of you have never really given the matter any thought and are thinking I make an interesting point. It's a whole new world in my head, people...buckle up! Ha! As it happens, Mr & Mrs Treehugger found out that...horrors...ONE of the fibers that goes into the making of SOME of the paper for SOME of the children's books Disney publishes is made from a tree in an endangered Indonesian rain forest. The very BEST way Sir and Ma'am Genius could come up with to stop this appalling travesty RIGHT. THIS. MINUTE. was to chain themselves to the front gates of Disney's Headquarters! Look...I don't mean to sound cavalier...yes, I do...I'm all for saving the planet...within reason. I buy organic, use the weird looking light bulbs, try to use my refillable water bottles most of the time, recycle (mostly), sort of care about gas mileage...you know...and stuff...but dress as Minnie Mouse and chain myself to a gate to take a stand for a tree halfway around the world? Who are we kidding?!? You got your 15 minutes...go home. Your little stunt in no way helped your tree...but it got you on the news and in the papers and we all know that's what you really wanted.
And that brings us here...with my grasp on reality becoming ever more tenuous...as I try to make sense of this. The Rapture is Saturday...IF you believe the crazy guy, who, BTW, made the same prediction 15-20 years ago and I guess we can all see how accurate he was that time...and for those expecting to be saved on Saturday, I hear there are a bunch of atheist's groups that are offering pet sitting...you can not make this stuff up...and if you're not saved on Saturday then the End of the World is in 5 months. Or...the End of the World is December of 2012. This is assuming, of course, that the end is coming and God has chosen to communicate this to us through a series of raving lunatics. I don't know about you, but I like my odds. Still...if it is coming...and it seems to me, that on some level, a nut is nut, and under a different set of circumstances the tree people could just as easily have ended up the Doomsday people, and perhaps it's a predisposition to that sort of belief/blind faith/obsession that drives them all...maybe it's just a matter of which leader or cause gets to them first. So if it is...WOW...this has been a LOT of blather to come to a point...for what are we saving the world?!?
Seriously!!! If it's the End of the World anyway, who gives a damn about a tree?
Reasonable question, isn't it?
Free Mickey Mouse!
XOXO
~CAT
So anyway...I'm at the gym this morning and the news ticker at the bottom of the screen flashes "Mickey & Minnie arrested in front of Disney HQ." I was taking a drink at the time whilst on the runny thingie and listening to my Kindle...this is FAR MORE than I have any business attempting at one time, BTW, and when I see this on the ticker, I end up covered in smartwater! Speaking of smartwater...I miss fruitwater, back before they tried to sweeten it and then did away with it all together in favour of vitaminwater...especially the watermelon...OMG...soooo good! Great, now I've made myself sad :( Back to the gym...no, I don't know what the runny thingie is called, I believe "runny thingie" is, in fact, the technical term. So I stare at the muted TV as if I can read lips, and have totally convinced myself that I will know when they start talking about it and be able to ask the trainers to turn it up. This did not happen. I'm pretty sure it was because they never commented on it, and not because I can't read lips. Naturally the second I got off the runny thingie, I'm sprinting for my iPhone to google Mickey & Minnie. And here's where it all sort of goes off the rails in my beautiful mind.
I don't know which group of crazies think the Rapture starts on Saturday, but I'm betting on not so much! What? Calling them "crazies" is insensitive? I'll draw your attention to the "it's my blog" rule. Rest assured that unless I happen to BE the crazy with Doomsday Prophecy and bunker, I will always side with the FBI, ATF, and any other sets of initials I deem appropriate.On that note, for anyone looking to join, "Cult Leader," totally on my bucket list, but I digress...so I hear people talking about the world ending in 5 months while I'm googling Mickey & Minnie's arrest, and to be helpful, "'cause that's how I roll," I offer that they shouldn't worry if nothing happens Saturday because there's always that 2012 silliness. I'm nothing if not helpful, you see. When I see the article about why Mickey Mouse was arrested whilst hearing people blather on about the end of the world...one can only take so much stupid at one time!!!
I get that going green is "in"...yes, yes, it's the responsible thing to do, save the planet...blah, blah, blah...but seriously? It's trendy...at the end of the day, lots of people are all about "saving the earth" because some celeb somewhere is driving a dumbass Prius! Why do the celebs care? Because it's a cause they can take up that makes them look caring and sensitive that's not too icky. Some of you may think I'm wrong, you're entitled, but I'm right...and some of you have never really given the matter any thought and are thinking I make an interesting point. It's a whole new world in my head, people...buckle up! Ha! As it happens, Mr & Mrs Treehugger found out that...horrors...ONE of the fibers that goes into the making of SOME of the paper for SOME of the children's books Disney publishes is made from a tree in an endangered Indonesian rain forest. The very BEST way Sir and Ma'am Genius could come up with to stop this appalling travesty RIGHT. THIS. MINUTE. was to chain themselves to the front gates of Disney's Headquarters! Look...I don't mean to sound cavalier...yes, I do...I'm all for saving the planet...within reason. I buy organic, use the weird looking light bulbs, try to use my refillable water bottles most of the time, recycle (mostly), sort of care about gas mileage...you know...and stuff...but dress as Minnie Mouse and chain myself to a gate to take a stand for a tree halfway around the world? Who are we kidding?!? You got your 15 minutes...go home. Your little stunt in no way helped your tree...but it got you on the news and in the papers and we all know that's what you really wanted.
And that brings us here...with my grasp on reality becoming ever more tenuous...as I try to make sense of this. The Rapture is Saturday...IF you believe the crazy guy, who, BTW, made the same prediction 15-20 years ago and I guess we can all see how accurate he was that time...and for those expecting to be saved on Saturday, I hear there are a bunch of atheist's groups that are offering pet sitting...you can not make this stuff up...and if you're not saved on Saturday then the End of the World is in 5 months. Or...the End of the World is December of 2012. This is assuming, of course, that the end is coming and God has chosen to communicate this to us through a series of raving lunatics. I don't know about you, but I like my odds. Still...if it is coming...and it seems to me, that on some level, a nut is nut, and under a different set of circumstances the tree people could just as easily have ended up the Doomsday people, and perhaps it's a predisposition to that sort of belief/blind faith/obsession that drives them all...maybe it's just a matter of which leader or cause gets to them first. So if it is...WOW...this has been a LOT of blather to come to a point...for what are we saving the world?!?
Seriously!!! If it's the End of the World anyway, who gives a damn about a tree?
Reasonable question, isn't it?
Free Mickey Mouse!
XOXO
~CAT
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