Sunday, April 17, 2011

Dear Alanis, THIS is IRONIC!

So it's Saturday morning and Husband and I want donuts.  We live in the middle of nowhere and have no restaurants of which to speak, save a small donut shop that makes the most delicious donuts I have ever tasted.  They're so good that we've come to learn that this place is famous...people come from hundreds of miles for these chocolate frosted pillows of heaven!  This may not be as significant as it sounds as we're 100 miles from the closest real population center.  Nevertheless, pillows of heaven?  Not an overstatement.  Yes, empty calories, loads of sugar, and on and on...well, my friends, it's worse than you think!
You see, this donut shop seems to have a bit of difficulty maintaining the standards of cleanliness the health department deems sufficient.  Quite a while ago their inspection rating was lowered from an "A" to a "B".  Call me crazy, but I simply did not need a donut that bad!  There were going to be no "B" donuts for this girl, thank you very much!  I showed them!  They got their "A" rating back, and all was right with the world again...Donuts for everyone! is sweet!
As it happens, I don't keep track of the health dept rating of the donut shop, or anywhere else for that matter, because really?  When does this come up?  And surely, if you lose your "A" rating once you're never going to let that happen again...right?  I guess not.  Because Husband was greeted, this lovely Saturday morning, that seemed so full of promise, with a big, health department "B" prominently displayed in the front window of the donut shop when he got there.  Being the wise man that he is, he not only knew better than to buy "B" donuts, but he thought better of coming home empty handed.
There is another donut shop in we had never tried...there had never been a need.  Why mess with perfection?  But, craving donuts, and left no other options, Husband braved this other place and came home with a bag...instead of the positively adorable pink bakery box from the "B" shop...of donuts, from the OTHER shop.  He brought me my coffee and a donut (isn't Husband a love?) and told me the sad, sad story of the "B" rating whilst we ate our, mediocre at best, donuts.  Pillows of heaven, these were not.  
But...It doesn't end there.  Oh no, mere disappointment wouldn't be nearly enough!  Why stop at disappoint when you can push through to torture?  And so, time passed.  We had each finished our donut and I was starting my second cup of coffee...and something...was...wrong.  And Husband was starting to look a bit green around the gills.  And something was...REALLY wrong.  And then the nausea came...for us BOTH!!!  All DAY and a good bit of Sunday for me, tho he perked up a little more quickly than I...
Yes, have read correctly.  So let's recap.  Wanted donuts.  Famous, delicious, pillows of heaven, had a bad health rating... SO...we opt for lousy, pillows of Walmart with a GOOD health rating and spend the weekend with food poisoning!

Dear Alanis,
Rain on your wedding day?  Not Ironic.  Food poisoning from the "A" rated donuts you got because the ones you wanted had a "B" rating from the health department? THIS is IRONIC!  Glad I could help!

~Princess CAT


  1. Oh no!!! That is awful!!! I hope you're feeling better now!! XX

  2. I think you will enjoy this...