Monday, June 20, 2011

Soooo...here's the thing...

I feel like I owe you an explanation...

I haven't blogged lately...not because I have nothing to say...things have been kind of crazy busy...tho that's REALLY no excuse...it should be more to tell, right?  It's more because I guess, rather than doing something I promised you...and myself...that I wouldn't do...I simply didn't write at all.  I promised I wouldn't self-edit...when you simply don't write at all, you go back and delete or edit...or at least that's what I've been telling myself.  But the more I think about it...as if it's not the most obvious thing ever...not writing all is TOTALLY self editing so who am I trying to kid???

At any right...it's a lousy explanation and I have no excuse...won't happen again.

Where to begin?  I have about a zillion things swimming in my head that I haven't blogged about, even tho I've been dying to but for any number of reasons, felt like I shouldn't...

Ahhhh..so does everyone remember CCL???  Oh wow, when I told you about her the first time...I NEVER thought it could get THIS weird!!!  But it did...and I was going to blog...and then I thought, is that mean?  So I didn't...but I promised not do that...soooo...oh dear!!!  As I'm not sharing her name anyway, how mean could it be...especially when I am merely relaying to you ACTUAL EVENTS and in truth, I can't imagine what to do with her now!

The hair thing was weird, but other than noticing her staring quite a bit, she'd left me alone for a little while.  Evidently, she was just planning her next move.  Last Monday...maybe the Friday before...totally unimportant...CCL decided to up her game!!!  She seems to have learned...maybe thru her SWF support group, that in order to get your target's attention, you should get them where they can't get away.  She has mastered this.  She waits until I am on a machine or in a corner and can't move and don't see her approach!  Damn you Animal Planet!!!

The first day, she decided to ask about issues/illnesses/afflictions/ whatever one chooses to call them that tend to affect my nerve endings and cause extraordinary pain when touchedAs you can imagine, she promptly started poking at all the places she thought might be affected.  I used almost no expletives while I STRONGLY recommended she stop that...NOW!!!

This didn't seem to come across quiet as authoritatively as I'd have liked.  DAMN!  2 days later she found me defenseless on the exercise bike.  She came and apologized for touching me without asking.  I thanked her, put my earbuds back in, and thought we were done.  She continued to stand there...oh good...she wasn't done.  

Before I continue...we all know, to one degree or another, we're just a little nuts!  It may be obsessively wondering if we've left the iron on or locked the garage.  It may be going throwing way more anti-bacterial products as an individual in day or two than some families of 4 use in a week.  We may be afraid of things that go bump in the night...but...you know...there are other kinds of crazy...

And one of those kinds, I was reminded my CCL, as she stood next to the bike waiting to consider out "conversation," is just how exactly lithium-dependent bi-polar she is!!!  Hey...people have problems...I don't judge...no...really...or whatever, you know, because that is definitely NOT the only thing that makes her CCL...but it was DEFINITELY enough to make me nervous when taken in conjunction with all of her other behaviours!!!  I mean...the staring, the touching, the SWF can I have your haircut...and I didn't even mention the shoes yet...and I told you guys I swear when I leave the gym the buzzards are circling because even they know it is just a matter of time before she dumps my body in the desert and leaves more for dead!  

Next thing I know it's a barrage of questions every time I turn around!  What kind of shoes am wearing?  Are they comfortable?  They look interesting...where did I get them?  CAN SHE TOUCH THEM?!?  Am I the only one weirded out here????  Then we've moved onto my clothes...and every. single. thing. I. wear.  Really?  This track suit, those yoga pants...and I can reply to those questions...most of them...without being made to feel terribly uncomfortable.  But now it's hot out and gym clothes are bit different, aren't they?  NO!  You may not touch my tight yoga shorts to "feel the fabric" you lunatic!!!  What part of your body do your yoga shorts cover that you would allow some loon to touch?!?  And then there are my tops...when I wear tees instead of gym shirts, they are more often than not fitted and reflect Husband's job...and are often customized as well.  They are not the sort of tees that one could just go buy, nor can I imagine why most people would want to...I would imagine they would lack meaning to most people...and NO YOU MAY NOT TOUCH THEM EITHER!!!


And because it just can't stop there...she asked for my digits!!!  UGH...might be time to change the phone number!!! LOL


Soooo...aren't you glad I'm back?  NO???  Not quite sure yet what tomorrow will hold...but I have so many things on my mind...who knows!!!  But I have a sneaking suspicion the "labels" will include:  Stephen King, California, Mayor


XOXO

~CAT


 

2 comments:

  1. That is crazy!!! Putting the earbuds back in your ears should have been the hint to go away.

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  2. That is so crazy! (And maybe just a little entertaining to read.)

    ReplyDelete